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Hello
dear, Ellies.
Your main thesis statement is indicated by, the history of basketball is engulfed by what basketball is today. The statement is appropriately placed at the begging of the essay to give the reader a clear view of what to expect throughout the work. To improve the understanding of the piece, I would recommend you provide a chronological account of events that took place to promote basketball and keep the reader abreast with these developments. The assay has tried to arrange even in order. However, it has failed by providing the commencement of the sport before letting us know who invented this game and what his motivation was. The most memorable part of the essay is the occasion provided when the basketball was first played in Olympic in 1963. This piece is memorable because it marks the first stride that sport took to gain acceptance from the people and large masses of teams. The essay has sparingly used transitions throughout the text. It would be prudent to use transitions such as; besides, furthermore, and also in order to help lay the content in a systematic manner. The essay does not have a conscious completion and leaves the audience hanging. You should have adopted a conclusion by letting the reader understand what future the basketball...